Decisions decisions.

I have exactly 9 days to make up my mind, again. I hate how i have commitment issues with school. As much as i want to go back to school, i don't want to give up again. Yes i know how it's a norm to go to school and not like it but idkw it's just the hardest thing to do. I was so excited for school at first. :c Maybe i rushed into it. I need to stop wasting time. :c As much as my mummy wants to talk to me about it, i refuse to. I hate to tell her i rlly don't know what i want to do. Another school? Another course? :c I use to have so much passion and fire for the things i love. Where did it all go? I use to be able to go to school even when i didn't want to. When there are stuff to be done, i'll pull through even at the very last second. What happenedddddd? I wish i could rewind time and just find out when did it start to go wrong. When did i start choosing the wrong paths and making all the wrong decisions. When did i change. :c I use to like school, to a certain extend. Enough to drag my ass there. 

I love my mum for not being furious at me. It's been 2-3 years already. :c Thanks for giving me options and letting me figure out. 2012 is coming. I need to get my head straight and start the new year afresh. This is such a wordy rant post. But i'm really fucking afraid. In this society, you can't survive without the papers and certs. In need of some real advice now :c Ones that doesn't tell me to just suck it up and continue cause i guess deep in my heart i know, if i went down the same road again, it'll turn out the same. I need to know what i really want. And be sure about it. 

Decisions decisions. If only i could turn back time and be 17 again. Or maybe 12. Hahahha.